Friends of BEAR | Mr. Bear UK

Peter

I was terrified at the thought of applying for Mr BEAR UK but my mates talked me into it.

So glad I did, it’s been such a character building and amazing experience. I’ve met so many wonderful people and had a brilliant time. I really wasn’t sure what it would involve going into, but Wayne put me at ease and explained everything that would be expected.

I was really nervous on the day of the heat in Manchester but again after meeting the judges and Kristian I felt much better. Everyone was so friendly and supportive and having my friends come and support me made it feel like a really good party atmosphere.

It’s been an awesome few months and I’ve loved every minute, I feel like I’d grown so much and gained a lot of confidence.

I’d recommend it to anyone. Standing on the stage with a few hundred people applauding is an amazing feeling and although it takes a little courage and confidence to get up there and do it, the returns are incredible.

BARRY (AKA TIGGS)

Aloha Dear Reader, I’m your friendly neighbourhood mental health champ, Tiggs.

I’ve been a mental health champion since I came out on my first world mental health day video, in
2021 on YouTube.

The experience of sharing my story with the world and what mental health challenges mean to me, was both frightening and liberating. Since then I have been fortunate
enough to help a number of individuals who have been brave enough to share when they are not ok.
Signposting them to the help they need.

At the time of writing this blog, I’m approaching 40. Originally from Ireland, I am lucky to call Manchester my home for the past 20 years. I have two beautiful cats who I adore, a fantastic family and some of the most amazing friends. Fitness, mental wellbeing, being a bit of a geek, and
adventures with the amazing people I have the good fortune of having in my life, is what I enjoy with my free time. I have founded and run a free, peer support fitness and wellbeing community for people who identify as queer/gay/bi men called Tiggs Tree House.

What made me a mental health advocate? Why am I so outspoken about mental health challenges?
I have had mental health challenges all my life. Namely, anxiety, depression, complex trauma and a low sense of self-worth. They have been my best friends, who have consistently been there through the years… Friends I was ashamed of… Friends I was afraid of… Friends who made it incredibly difficult for me to relate to other people and to accept myself…

I had been in and out of counselling for a number of years; taking on the challenges of knowing myself better, where I fit into the world and how my mental health challenges are a part of that.

Finally I realised that my mental health challenges are great friends of mine. Friends to be proud of!

There are no such thing as negative emotions, just negative perceptions of those emotions. All emotions are there for a reason. To tell us something! We should welcome and accept them for who they are. They are a part of us and deserve love too.

After coming out as having mental health challenges, in all aspects of life; I’ve been able to live a much more authentic life, making my mental health challenges my friends. Helping people to have safe spaces to share how they are feeling is paramount to a more authentic life, a more authentic you. Safe faces, mean safe spaces.

You may have noticed throughout this blog, I’ve not used the word “issues”. I am not a fan of the term mental health issues. I prefer mental health challenges. It’s a challenge to know yourself better.

Experiencing mental health challenges can make us superheroes; sort of like the X-men. We have a unique lens and view point on the world that others do not have, because of the challenges that we have faced, and continue to face and overcome throughout our lives. That’s pretty special. You are special!

This is why I’m a mental health advocate. I want anyone experiencing mental health challenges to know; you are not alone, you are loved and you are a superhero!

In a world where you can be anything, be your beautifully perfect imperfect self.

If you are interested in my world mental health day videos, there is a link to my YouTube below. If you are interested in joining my peer support fitness and wellbeing group, there is a link to the socials and the group below as well as a link to my Instagram.

Let’s normalise talking about having mental health challenges and being the amazing superheroes
we are; making the world a safe space by being the safe faces.

Much love and bouncy Tiggs hugs.

Your friendly neighbourhood Tiggs, signing out.
Personal Links
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tiggstimes
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@tiggstimes
Tiggs Tree House Links
X/Twitter: @tiggstreehouse
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tiggstreehouse
Discord: https://discord.gg/qMs9cub6qf
Photo Credit Paton Yates Photography
X/Twitter: @PatonYatesPhoto
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/patonyatesphotography

Mr BEAR Brighton UK 2023

Name: Rainer Schmidt (yogidaddybear on insta)

Location: Brighton

Hobbies and Interests: Friends, bears, travelling, video games

We asked Rainer…

What made you enter Mr BEAR Brighton?..

Since I was young I have always been attracted to the bigger type of man. As a young gay man, I never felt included in the gay scene. Ok, in the 90's I was slim but I loved to grow a beard and I loved body hairs on others and on me ( I don't have much but I was proud of what I had... ).

I moved to Berlin when I was around 21 years old I found my place in Berlin in the Bear Bars and Bear community. They welcomed me there with an open furry heart. The same thing happened again when I move to Brighton in 2016. The Bear scene in Brighton made me feel like home and I enjoyed the Brighton Bear Weekend so much, that I wanted to give the Bear community something back, which made me to enter the Mr. Brighton Bear competition.

What was the best part about participating in the contest?

The fun we all had together. The contestants, the volunteers, the organisers. Everyone was so amazing, it was just great to have that community feeling during the Brighton Bear weekend.

How did it make you feel when you won?

It was just overwhelming, but in a nice way. I am not the most confident person and I would not go on stage and give a speach in front of people. So during the competition I had to step out of my comfort zone, what wasn't easy sometimes, but having my husbear and friends by my side was a great experience. Winning the competition showed me how much I am supported by the people around me, and made me realise that I do or did something right to have this supportive community.

What things have you done since winning the title?

I traveled to some Bear events in the UK, Europe and Brazil. For example, I went to Folsom Europe last year and I was invited to volunteer at the entrance, to collect money for a charity and support the event. I met then 40 brothers and we had such a great time. During that day I met so many interesting people and made new friends. This is what I love most of it. In the evening, I went to the Bear Dance Party Berlin and welcomed the guests.

Besides that, whenever I travel for leisure, I try as much as I can to promote Brighton and Brighton Bear Weekend at venues I go to and with people I meet. It is a nice journey and again I have to step out of my comfort zone, but I am again supported by my byrothers (these are all sash holders) and the bear community, which makes it easier.

What advice would you give to others who wish to apply for the title?

Do it, have fun and just be you. You'll find great support from different people, and you will have a great time doing it. And you'll be giving something back to the community, so there are no downsides to it.

How did you hear about us and have you been to any of our social events?

I invited the Mr Bear UK '22 to march with me at the pride in Brighton in '23. When we met and talked about our future plans he asked me if I wanted to be judge of Mr. Bear London heads. How could I say no?

What do you most love about the Bear community?

The cuddles, and the amazing people giving them.

Gary R

I've been a member of the group less than a year, and it's been great.

I'm so rubbish at meeting new people! But I've now attended a few events in both Birmingham and Blackpool, and they're really friendly. Great way to meet new people. And good fun!

Brian

Hi my name's Brian, I'm from Glasgow.

So why Mr Bear UK? I'm a late to the scene guy I came out when I was 30 (now 54). I've had the same stereotypical background as any other guy of my age. It was still illegal in Scotland to be gay till 1981, bullied at school, in the closet afraid to tell my Parents.

First day on the scene changed that; the first gay bar I ran into my gay cousin who introduced me to my first boyfriend, seven years later the boyfriend was an ex and still my parents didn't know.

I like the shady side of gay leathers rubber bondage. I have run beginners fetish clubs, that's how I found out about The Mr Bear UK Competition, as it was due to be held in the regular pub I attended,The Underground Bar Glasgow.

I competed in 2022 and came second in the heat but wasn't able to attend the final that year due to having COVID. I was so gutted the heat competition was so fun and allowed my hidden side to pop out on the stage.
It was so well organised that every day Wayne and the other Moderators encouraged and boosted me and the other contestants with witty banter that made you feel belonged.

Skipping forward a year I got the chance of competing in the Blackpool heats one step closer to the finals. What a weekend, all planned down to the last minute by the Moderators of the Mr Bear UK site. Arrived to VIP treatment and VIP area nibbles and free Prosecco, how could the night not go well.
Anyway didn't make the big final but by now I'd made many new friends from the competitors to the Moderators all great guys so easy to get on with and absolutely no judgement.

One of my fears was my body wouldn't be good enough for the night . I thought I'd never fit in. It couldn't have been further from the truth everyone accepted no judgement.

Had such a great weekend I'd encourage anyone to come try, you will never find a more supportive safe environment to try something outside the box.

I've since tried to encourage other guys to join in and have found a common barrier of not being body positive . Let me tell you if that's all that's holding you back forget it and join in the 2024 competition.

Russ

My name is Russ. Born on the Isle of Wight. Grew up in Portsmouth. Lived in various places on the south coast until I moved to Glasgow nearly 12 years ago.

I guess I always have been gay but due to being brought up in a religious home didn't think I could be gay. Then at 21 I met a guy we kissed there were fireworks and it all made sense. I liked, no loved men.

I soon made up for lost time with the help back then of gaydar and chat rooms. SUCH FUN! Everytime I had an encounter I knew more what I wanted. I always loved a hairy chest though.

Hairier the better. And preference for a thicker man made me realise I love bears. And being hairy myself and not that thin realise I fit into the bear community. Whether I'm a bear or cub I don't know and I don't think it really matters.

You be the best bear or cub or otter or lover of bears cubs or otters you can be.

Leathermen Cymru

Leathermen Cymru is a fantastic social group for gay and bi men who are into leather, rubber, uniforms and skin gear.
They can be seen on Facebook.

We at BEAR love the fact that Leathermen Cymru organise social events and we are privileged to know a lot of its members.

As well as social events; Leathermen Cymru organises its Annual General Meeting.

In 2022, we donated toward a Leathermen Cymru social night.

Leathermen Cymru have been involved with our Mr BEAR UK Competition, and have judged Mr BEAR UK Cardiff Heat two years running. In 2023, Leathermen Cymru kindly donated the cash prize for the winner of the heat.

Poni

We asked Poni:

Where are you from?

I’m from Chester originally but moved to Manchester

8 years ago.

What do you like to do in your spare time?

I love to go walking in the countryside.

Something about walking to the top of a hill and looking out over fields is just awesome. Oh and I love a Takeaway in bed watching a movie ;-)

How long have you been a DJ?

I’ve been a DJ for 16 years.

What do you enjoy the most about dj’ing?

I love how music can help people’s night be that much better. That certain song that you think ‘Tune’ and either dance or bop away is what really drives my love for DJ’ing.

What is your favourite music?

I like a lot of music but my personal favourite is Country music.

What do you enjoy most about hosting the Finals of Mr BEAR UK?

Don’t get me wrong it’s a great party of course but the thing I love the most is getting to know the folks and introducing them to the audience. They are all such amazing people, and it humbles me that I get to be a part of their journey.

Do you ever guess who is going to win before the

votes are in?

No. I sometimes think after the finalists have spoken ‘That was great they should have a chance’ but then when everyone else speaks I think the same about them haha. My attitude is to go into the event with a completely neutral mindset and then everyone gets the same treatment 

What do you think of the BEAR group and its team?

I love it. I love the confidence that guys have when they post pictures. I love the support that everyone gives and how friendly all are. I only know a select few of the BEAR admin team and I’ve thought they have been very nice and supportive. Maybe not Wayne on some of the photo’s he has taken of him and I haha…. I joke. But It’s great to have a group like this where people of all shapes, sizes and age come to without fear of discrimination.

What are some of the issues you feel that need to be addressed in the bear community?

Mental Health is a big one. I don’t feel people talk enough nor be open. If we spoke more and were open and honest with each other, we would be less anxious and more confident. Confidence is another. Personally, I think everyone looks fantastic but sometimes our own thoughts are our biggest demons. Learn to love yourself and the rest will follow (RuPaul cliché I know but it’s so true)

Phil H

As a member of the BEAR group, I have found it a very friendly and positive group. It's great to be a part of it, with great people and making new friends.

I was honoured to take part in the first Mr BEAR UK in Blackpool and found it very empowering; it was great that in the bear community you can feel that you are part of something and celebrate the way that you look; as I said being in Mr BEAR UK gave me confidence and more friends within the group; the thrill of taking part and making a difference I felt that it paved the way for all bears to feel celebrated.

I look forward to the following years. I've attending some of the great social events and make the effort.

I'd like to thank personally Wayne who is a strong character within the bear group and makes everybody feel at ease… love you all.

Bears in Lancashire

Since establishing ourselves in 2016 we’ve made every possible attempt to work with other Facebook groups.

We regularly cooperate and participate with several international groups but here in the UK we have a very good working relationship with Bears In Lancashire, Gay Uk & Hairy Guy Fans.

While we consider all our relationships valuable, Bears In Lancashire is the one we are particularly close to, going so far as to have one of our team working for them in an advisory role.

John Street is their lead admin and is a pleasure to work with, both as a group leader, community leader and a friend.

Ryan

I joined the bear groups and was supported by admins from the beginning. Even when I doubted myself about whether I was good enough and bear enough to join in I was encouraged and supported to post and take part and not be scared.

Eventually, I was even encouraged and supported by the wonderful community and admins to take part in the Mr Bear UK competition and with that help and support overcame a massive fear of mine and although winning was never in my mind they were right that I would be supported by the bear community enough to even be topless and in underwear on stage.

What a wonderful group and community!